OK so we all know about Rebecca Black and her unfortunate song Friday. I am actually of the opinion it’s not that bad, I mean it is pretty crap but it definitely is not the worst song someone has sung and posted on Youtube in all seriousness. In fact if she got a few singing lessons and wrote her own songs (I’m 100% sure a 13 year old could write better lyrics than the dick who wrote Friday) she wouldn’t be that bad.
So in defence of an innocent teenager who is the laughing stock of the enture internet, I would like to present to you all, the worst music videos on the internet as picked by me:
Treasure by Namata
This is, in my opinion, one of the greatest things to ever get uploaded to Youtube. It is so bad it’s AMAZING! The only bad thing about it, in my opinion, is how it can stay stuck in my head for days after listening to it just once. I really hope this guy gets a record deal one day. And that he never stops dancing like that because it is mesmerising.
Give It To Me by Madonna (feat Pharrell)
Bad songs and music videos aren’t just for the realm of the pathetic wannabe popstar, here we have a stunning example of how one of the most famous popstars of all times paired with one of the best urban producers can get it so wrong. The song itself makes me want to scrape my ears off with a soup spoon, let alone the eye-raping video. Good lord Madonna, they’re called pants, try wearing them for a change now that you’re 50 years old.
No Way No Way by Vanilla
How about this little treasure from the late 90s. Anything that samples Mah Nà Mah Nà that isn’t aimed specifically at kids has got to be bad and this is just about the worst. Actually, it’s been voted the worst music video a number of times. Check out those outfits… I was sure that sort of stuff went out of fashion in 1993 but clearly Essex is a good five years behind everything ever.
Je Suis Une Dolly by Dolly Rockers
Well I don’t even know where to begin with this little treasure, also a talentless British girl group. Sometimes Pommy accents make songs sound brilliant, but most of the time they make a song sound like complete arse. Uneducated, chavish arse. And look at how wacky they are, dancing on the tube! I find it amusing how 60% of the reaction shots are of people looking appalled, the rest of pervy men taking photos on their phones. Which incidently, appears to be how this clip was filmed. Oh and look, they actually got a budget and remade the same clip with a new song.
Party Like a Millionaire by The Millionaires
Want to know something really sad? Ke$ha wasn’t the first one who started trash-pop. Oh no, these young ladies were around before she got her big break with Tik Tok and before she ruined my eyes/eardrums with We R Who We R (seriously, that is not a song, it is autotune over the sound of a garbage truck with bad product placement scattered everywhere). I can’t even comprehend this song, I mean, what did their parents think when they heard the first line? As much as I hate Ke$ha, at least she keeps the tight-pussies and hard-dick lyrics to herself. Meanwhile, if you’d like to make yourself feel smart and extremely articulate, take a look at their Millionaires Dictionary video. Good god.
Bearforce1 by Bearforce1
OK so I’ve focused on the ladies way too much. How about something that is aimed so specifically at a certain target audience, it pretty much alienates about 99.9% of the entire world. I personally don’t think it’s that bad, in fact for a gay bear dance song, it’s probably the top of it’s game. Also, their pastel shirts and white pants are just adorable. But if you’re hoping to make your straight, male friends uncomfortable, this clip will do the trick.
Imma Be Rocking That Body by Black Eyed Peas
This clip just proves that no matter how much money you pour into a music video, the shittiness of the song still radiates through. Seriously, can someone explain to me what the hell is going on here? And then try and explain how the Black Eyed Peas became this bad? I don’t even think it’s Fergie’s fault any more, they’re all responsible for turning the group so shit. Someone needs to confiscate their SFX mic and explain to them songs don’t need to change style 7 times to keep the youth of today interested.
Because I could probably keep adding to this list forever, I will leave it with this hilarious version of Friday. Gang Fight!
So if you’re one of those Rebecca Black haters, please just think about what Simon Cowell said about her and her song:
He advised Black not to “listen to anyone over the age of 18. I’m being deadly serious. Whatever she’s done has worked. Whether you like her or not, she’s the most talked-about artist in America right now. Nobody over the age of 18 should understand her or like her. So she should just do it her way.”
Bad music videos ain’t anything new, there are millions out there far worse than anything a 13 year old Californian girl could ever hope to create. Instead of hatin’, celebrate how she is just adding to the list of hilarious awful tings we will all reminisce about when we’re old folks.
About Ruby
My name is Cara (but you can call me Ruby) and I like the colour pink, swearing, fist shaking, daggy dancing and 90s RnB music. Often all at once. I live in Brisbane which is always warm and is famous for its zombies.
I've been listening to cheesy RnB jamz lately, like they're going out of fashion. HA! We all know that'll never happen!about 2 days agofrom webReplyRetweetFavorite
I am such a suburban cliché. Mowing the lawn and washing my car in a bikini. Whatever, prudes, it's bloody hot outside!about 3 days agofrom webReplyRetweetFavorite
So I was killing time on Friday evening after work before an appointment, and decided to check out the shoe department at David Jones. I rarely do this, since I know I will get into a jealous rage at all of the amazing shoes In can’t afford and feel depressed for two days afterwards. This time though was different. I have my mind set on a certain type of shoe for my new job (see the Mary Janes in the previous post) so I could appreciate the extra lovely shoes without getting too upset.
The thing I found the most interesting were the amount of designer gumboots I found! For one thing, I haven’t seen this sort of thing since I was living in London in about 2005 when high-heeled gumboots were in, plus summer is almost over which is the wet season in Queensland so the need for expensive gumboots is minimal. But regardless, I was kind of excited by this find and thought I’d share with you some of the designer gumboots I found:
I love these and at $140 I actually think that’s a fair price for such stylish gumboots. I bought some shitty ones for $20 from some awful cheap accessories shop for a festival late last year, when these would have been 100x better and probably not caused scarring where the rubbed my calves. They also do another nice pair called Midnight Rain.
I did know Burberry did gumboots but I wasn’t aware of just how many! I really like these ones, the only ones they actually had, because they’re classy and understated and don’t feature that god-awful Burberry print. I also dig how they make no pretense that they’re anything but a gumboot. It is what it is while managing to be pretty classy and oh-so-shiney.
Rain Boot by Emporio Armani
There is something so ridiculously decadent about an Armani boot, I can hardly comprehend it. The ones I saw (not these exact ones as I can’t find them anywhere on the internet) were pretty reasonably priced too, only $275. God knows owning these would be the only way I could afford a pair of Armani boots any time soon!
OK so I didn’t see these there, which is lucky because I probably would have bought them there and then! Patent pink gumboots with heels? Um, yes please.
Actually, as it turns out there is so much variety in gumboots at the moment, it’s really hard to pick the perfect pair. Here are a lot of excellent examples, including ones by Chloe, Hunter, Valentino, Dirty Laundry and many others. Who would have ever thought??? I think I might just start putting away some money for some designed gumboots for the next festival season!
I have decided I need to write more about fashion on this lil ol’ blog of mine. God knows I spend 90% of my life thinking about and buying new clothes, so why don’t talk about it more? I will try and change that :)
Malice Dress in Wild Roses by Lena Hoschek. My god I want just about everything from her latest season :O
Mary Jane heels by Dr Martens. I stare at these every time I pass Downes Shoes near my place. I imagine they’re super comfortable which is all I need in a heel.
Lorissa Studded & Crystal Peeptoes by Sam Edelman. I actually saw a version of these in a shop in the City and haven’t stopped thinking about them since. I don’t care if they’re comfy or if I can’t walk in them, I must have them!
Kissing Poodles Necklace by Lovisa. I just found this shop (have I mentioned how much I love working in the City again??!) and was thrilled by their Skulls & Crosses collection (no pics of the pieces I liked unfortunately). I love affordable jewelry!
Black Blouse by Ella Lai. Since I am about to start a super corporate job, I have been keeping an eye out of awesome, unusual tops that will cover my tattoos. For once those annoying daily etsy emails paid off!
I’ve always loved Nate Dogg since I got my Hit Machine 13 CD as a kid which had Regulateon it (that’s basically how I becamse a fan of a lot of music, through compilations CDs in the mid-late 90s). I’m a big fan of melodic hip hop and always loved the element he’d bring into rap tracks with that silky smooth voice.
I don’t have much else to say so I will leave you with a few of my favourite tracks involving Nate Dee Oh Double Gee.
I Got Love
Shake That – Eminem feat. Nate Dogg (one of my all time favourites)
As everyone is well aware, a terrible tragedy has struck Japan. We were only just getting over the shock of the Christchurch quake that killed at least 166 people three weeks go and Mother Natures unleashed her wrath all over again. I remember thinking/saying back when the quake hit Christchurch that it could have been an even worse disaster had it struck a more densely populated area, a small consolation in such a devastating tragedy.
I keep looking at photos of the carnage of the tsunami’s and it’s hard not to cry. I’ve always had a soft spot for Japan, especially since I went there in September 2009. I can’t even imagine how they will clean it all up, how the country will recover. Seeing the devastated faces of those people is just heartbreaking. I’m still not quite over the Queensland floods from january and now we have these killer earthquakes so close to home. It’s just terrifying and I can’t even imagine having to live through something like that.
Meanwhile, I just wanted to vent some rage at the overwhelming ignorance people have been displaying about this disaster. I was first made aware of it when I read this VICE article. I almost couldn’t believe it, people are comparing this event to Pearl Harbor? Really???!! I’m torn between bewildered disbelief and angry acceptance because I guess it’s not all that surprising that people are so damn ignorant and proud of it. I’m actually surprised no one has said anything about it being karma for the whales, but no, the average US citizen only remembers what happens in their country, particularly when glorified in a big budget Hollywood film (seriously, would most of those people know anything about what happened at Pearl Harbor if it wasn’t for that movie? I doubt it). HEY ARSEHOLES! No country, no matter what happened during war, deserves something like this. What, are we all hoping something will happen to Germany to get back at all them damn Nazi’s? It’s an absolutely appalling mentality and it scares me to think there are so many of these ignorant fools out there.
So if you’ve already donated or are unable to, another awesome public service would be to troll the Facebooks of these absolute douchebags and give ‘em what for! But really, if you see anything like this on your Facebook feed, please don’t ignore it. Things like this ought to be addressed because ignorance doesn’t fix itself, it’s up to the more informed and less racist people in society to make a difference!
I recently read an amazing blog from a heavily tattooed girl explaining how getting tattooed may change your life. It’s great because this isn’t something anyone tells you before you trot off to get your first tattoo. You’re either told “you’ll regret it for the rest of your life” or “you’ll love it and regret it if you don’t”. There never seems to be any middle ground, explaining the pro’s and cons, so it was lovely to see someone explain it the good (and bad) ways it will change your life.
It was an especially interesting read for me, because I was made redundant recently and am in the process of applying for jobs. I’ve only had a couple of face-to-face interviews so far and have had to cover my tattoos with long sleeves and thick black stockings so that they won’t know the truth. Because I am currently applying for jobs in corporate environments, I pretty much don’t have a choice because I know I won’t have a chance if I turned up with any tattoos showing, even if I was absolutely perfect for the role.
I can honestly say I have never regretted my tattoos. I love them and am glad I got them in the first place. But I know they can act as a sort of “barrier” between people and the real me. Tattoos do not define me, but to the uninformed stranger that’s all they see and so, in a sense, they do define me. I have turned so many people around on their negative stance on tattoos by being a lovely person and not being the stereotypical deadshit covered in badly-done tattoos. But I have to work hard on some people, show them they’re just a small part of me that makes me a bit more colourful than the average person.
If you’re considering getting a tattoo, please understand it will change your life and you will forever be trying to prove to narrow-minded people that you’re a decent person. By getting a tattoo you’ve set yourself up for dumb questions, having random people touching them and thinly veiled insults (like “oh but you’re so pretty, why did you get so many tattoos for?”). It is up to you to then deflect any negativity by being patient with those who don’t “get” tattoos, explaining what they mean to you and proving you’re a normal person like they are, you just have some lovely, permanent decorations on your skin. And the sad reality is, you will probably have to cover them up for a lot of jobs which is a massive pain in the butt (especially if you live somewhere like Brisbane where you sweat half to death by just being outside for five minutes in the height of summer).
It’s not all bad though, a lot of people do love tattoos even if they don’t have any and you will encounter lots of positivity about them and if you’re really lucky, you will find a great job where they don’t mind your them and let you show the off while working. I am hoping I will one day find the perfect job where my pink hair, colourful tattoos and awesome personality are not only accepted but encouraged!
Did you think you were going to get away with me not mentioning Lady Gaga or her new single? HA! I was almost last for work this morning as I stumbled upon it as I was doing my breakfast-and-facebook thang and chose to watch it instead of leaving on time.
I wasn’t sure how I felt about the song when it came out, but as expected it has grown on me and I really like it now. I can’t say I love it yet but I know I will, just like I did with Poker Face (I thought it was terrible and sounded just like Just Dance but bow thoroughly enjoy screeching it loudly at inopportune times). I was delighted by her performance of it at the Grammy’s and so was very excited about the video. Like with the song, it took me a few tries to make a decision and yeah, I love it. It’s a bit crazy and I admit I do not get a lot of the symbolism and stuff, but it’s weird, dark and quirky which is fine by me. I LOVE the skeletons in suits, I want to do that for Halloween this year! I also couldn’t get over Gaga’s body – oh my lord. If I had an arse half that good I;d never wear pants either! And her stomach. Goodness me. Let’s just say I worked extra hard at gym tonight after watching that video a few times!
The downfall with the clip though, is her dancing. She is not a dancer and even though I’m sure she practices a lot, she never will be. I cracked up at the 5:53 point when she’s spazz dancing for no apparent reason. I just think she should worry less about having elaborate dance routines in her clips when it’s just not her forte. She’s a singer and a performer, so let’s leave the dancing to those who need it to pep up their otherwise boring-as-hell film clips!
