Getting a Brazilian

In case the picture didn’t make it clear, I am indeed talking about the brazilian wax. I have been getting brazilian’s done for a few years now and I find people still have this weird idea of what a brazilian wax is all about. Yes, all the hair goes. No, you don’t leave a “landing” strip of hair (I don’t know anyone who ever has and I wonder why you’d bother). Yes it does hurt, but it’s bearable. I got one done today which was one of the best ones I have ever had. My last experience was horrendous because the girl who did it was rough, did it far too quickly and only use wax strips. Plus she left lots of stray hairs which was highly unprofessional of her. I left the salon with a burning box and a little extra money in my purse because it was very cheap. Which is probably why it was so bad, come to think of it. So for anyone who’s unfamiliar with brazilian waxes, here are my tips for getting the most out of the experience:

• Don’t kid yourself, it does hurt. But if done properly it’s not a terrible pain and apart from the middle strip (which hurts like a mofo) it’s not all that bad. Wax strips hurt the most but they’re quicker and grab more hairs. Hot wax hardly hurts at all but they have to go over the same spot a couple of times to get all the hairs. Wax strips are typically used on the less sensitive areas while hot wax is used where it’s very tender (eg. closer to your lady bits). Be wary of places that only use strips because it hurts and is bad for the ultra-sensitive areas.
• Don’t got for cheap. I’ve made that mistake a few times and always regret it. It’s like most things, cheaper alternatives are usually the shittier alternatives. The wax I got last was $35 and was painful and not done properly. The one I got today was $65 (though the prices goes down if you go back there every 6-8 weeks) and was barely painful, beautifully done and had impeccable service. Making sure you get waxed every 6-8 weeks is what keeps the cost down too – I always leave mine much longer so it’s like starting all over again every time I go. I really must stop that…
• Find a good beauty therapist and stick with them! I had the best girl do mine for years, until one day she was gone and I couldn’t track her down. She used nothing but hot wax and spent the whole time having great conversations with me. She wasn’t cheap or fast but she did an amazing job and I loved visiting her. When she disappeared  was lost! I went to Brazilian Beauty today which a friend recommended to me and I will keep going there. The girl I had today was lovely and did an awesome job, as I have said many times now. If you find someone who does a good job, stick with them. That was you have less to dread before each visit because they’re a familiar face who knows what you get done and won’t disappoint you.
• Be aware that any waxing down there is a fairly embarrassing experience. You’re lying on a table with your legs spread and nothing to hide your shame from a total stranger. If ever I’m feeling especially embarrassed, I remind myself that they do this for a living and have seen it all and would have seen a LOT worse than me. Can you imagine the horror stories those beauty therapists have to tell? You can be damn sure you wouldn’t even register on their list of terrible clients.
• STOP SHAVING! I fall into the “oh I’ll just shave this time” trap all the time even though I know how BAD it is. Despite popular belief your hairs don’t grow back thicker (on any part of your body), but shaving makes the end of the hairs bunt and therefore seem coarser. Shaving also causes lots of ingrown hairs and can also wreck the way the hairs grow which means it’s going to hurt more next time you do get a wax (I know this from lots of experience). But most importantly, shaving only gets rid of the hair for a day or two before you get nasty, itchy stubble that is almost unbearable for those initial days of growing out. Then you have to wait another 6 weeks before you can go get it waxed. It’s never worth it.
• I don’t do after-care because I am really slack. here are a lot of good products out there, but I don’t know anything about them. There are moisturisers that help minimise ingrowns and slow down regrowth but I’m a scrooge and am never willing to fork out the money for it. If anyone has opinions or recommendations on after-care, please let me know!

So what are the benefits of waxing it all off down there? Personally I think it looks better, but that is my personal taste. I don’t think it makes me look like a prepubescent girl because I’m clearly NOT a ten year old and do not think that having hair down there makes me look more “grown up”, so you have my permission to punch anyone who suggests that to you. Pubic hair apparently has a purpose, or so some doctors say. But this is an era where we all clean down there frequently and wear clothing that protects our genitals from the outside elements, and I do not see why we need pubes this day and age. I feel a lot cleaner without the short-and-curlies and it’s generally just a nicer feeling to be bare down there. Everyone’s different though, so get whatever makes you feel good. I started off with just regular g-string waxes which leaves a decent amount of hair before I moved on to the brazilian, so I suggest doing that for your first couple of times if you’re not sure what you want. But I’m telling you now, one you go brazilian you never go…back… Or something like that.