Why should I lose weight for my wedding anyway?

July 24, 2015
Body and Soul, Feminism, Wedding

home_wedding

In case you missed it, Ben and I are getting married on Halloween this year. As far as weddings go, we didn’t leave ourselves much time to get organising, particularly since we skipped off to Japan for almost a month shortly after deciding we wanted a Halloween wedding! I’m better at planning stuff last-minute anyway, or so I like to keep telling myself.

Weddings, even unconventional ones like ours, are a big deal to plan. Honestly if we weren’t having a themed wedding with a very specific idea in mind, I’d be more than happy to just have a chilled out backyard wedding with minimal cost or planning needed! But obviously, because I am who I am, it’s gonna be a bit of an extravagant affair. We’ve only got just over three months til the big day and soooo much left to do, OMG the stress! But I reckon we’ll get it all sorted and it’ll be the best party ever.

There are a couple of things bugging me pretty badly though, one in particular I have been internalising but then read this awesome article by Lindy West about how perfect her wedding was despite being fat. It was a wonderful read and made me really think about my desire to shed some weight before my wedding. I am determined to tone up my upper body as I noticed some fatty bit when I tried my dress on. But why? Why am I so determined to change a part of my body that’s going to be incredibly difficult to target (seriously, how do you even target your fatty armpit/side boob area? Push ups?)  just so I can look back at my wedding photos years down the track and think “ahhh not having arm fat that day made the whole experience that little extra bit special”. I mean, I’m wearing a dress that has so much damn tulle that you could kick my shin and it’d take five minutes for you to connect with me, so losing weight on my lower half would be kind of pointless if I’m specifically trying to lose weight for the wedding.  So I’m literally worrying myself over a fine layer of fat on my back and around/on my arms which most people have unless they’re body builders or dramatically underweight.

I’m trying to make my wedding as pro-feminist as possible but I can’t help but still worry about the trivial, patriarchal bullshit that women are told they’re supposed to worry about. Ben couldn’t give a shit if I lost/gained some weight before we get married and yet I am worried about being a fat wife, of guests thinking “geez she could have at last toned up a bit” or seeing the photos and only being able to see my chubby arms and not how wonderful a day it was. What a goddamn waste! I’m ever so slowly getting to a point where my weight isn’t the source of most of my misery, but I still panic at the thought of not looking slim and”perfect” on my wedding day. I never even believed in weddings until recently!

Weddings are such silly, sexist, heteronormative things. There are so many silly, expensive things women are convinced they have to do to look “perfect” while the man just chucks a suit on, shaves and turns up on time. I am very excited about turning up and blowing everyone’s minds with my awesome dress, but I mostly just want to have an awesome time with my friends and family. Who actually gives a shit if I don’t lose 15kg anyway? Not anyone who’ll be attending my wedding, that’s for damn sure!

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Kawaii Klaws: An Update

July 16, 2015
Kawaii Klaws, My Life, Nails

Hi guys, I have been very quiet on here about my foray into nails, which I wanted to remedy immediately! I’m still doing nails as much as possible and it’s still something I’m hella passionate about. I have not yet made an attempt to do it full time though that still is the ultimate goal. But I will continue in more depth after I share a few recent, fun designs I’ve done:

  
  
I’m still doing nails part time while maintaining a part time office job to help pay the bills. I think about starting my own nail salon constantly but I don’t feel like I’m ready to make the leap yet. I enjoy having a regular income that pays all of the bills and lets me buy fun things and go overseas each year, though I know I will have to take the plunge and start doing nails full time at some stage. I guess I’m still nervous because although I’ve been at it for a year, I know I have so much room for improvement and have a niggling fear of failure if I make the commitment too soon.

Apart from doing nails from home, I have been doing pop up events at cafes and bars and for Hen’s parties and I will soon be spending one Saturday a month at a local hair salon doing the nails of people while they have their hair done. It’s really fun! I absolutely love nail art and am so happy that I turned out to be pretty darn good at it and enjoy it so much. It’s mostly the acrylics side of things that’s the most daunting but I know that I will only get better the more I do.

  
  
If you’d like to see more of my nail art, check out my flickr album where I’ve uploaded the majority of my work! If you’re in Brisbane and would like me to do your nails, please check out my facebook page :D

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What I Wore: Bright and cartoony for Finders Keepers

July 8, 2015
Fashion and makeup, My Life, What I Wore

On Saturday I went with my friend Melissa to check out the Finders Keepers markets at the Old Museum. I’ve been going to these markets for years, mostly to support friends who have stalls there as a lot of the stuff there isn’t to my liking (it’s a bit too beige, quaint and “whimsy” for me). But it’s a good excuse to go out and support locals who hand make their wares. I wanted to wear my Simpsons x Hello Kitty dress as I haven’t worn it much and it’s just so damn cute! I also wanted to combat the muted colours I knew I’d encounter at the markets and so I chose lots of brights accessories.

 

Dress: The Simpsons x Hello Kitty Village Dress from Japan LA
Stockings: Plus Sized Solid Color Tights in Sky Blue from We Love Colors
Hair bow: Made by my for Ruby Kawaii
Accessories: Earrings and Hell-no Kitty necklace from Miss-a-ree Guts, peace heart necklace from Fancy Pocket Harajuku, brooch by Winnfreds Daughter, bracelets from Japan
Shoes: Jelly sandals from Windsor Smith

 
(With Mel outside the Old Museum and with Ella Mobbs, one of my favourite Brisbane artists)

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Ruby Reviews June 2015

July 1, 2015
Movies, Nerds and Geeks

tomorrowland

Tomorrowland
OK so this movie came out a little while ago now, and I had every intention of dedicating an entire post to it, but I just never got around to it and now I have a couple of other films I’d also like to review. I really liked this film, but was dismayed when I saw how poorly it was doing. I’m always hearing people complain about how films are rarely original these days, they’re all reboots or sequels or live-action adaptions of animated movies or whatever which is getting pretty boring. And yet this very original film comes out and no one bothers to see it. C’mon guys! I guess it’s because people assumed it was some sort of lazy Disney-park adaption when the only thing it shared with the Disney park is the name and the general “retro futuristic city” theme. Disney did a great job of creating an amazing new world (that may not quite be as it seems) with two of the three leading actors being young, smart women. They even did a decent enough job with diversity! My only fault with it that it was a tiny bit too family-friendly for my liking which was a little bit cheesy, but otherwise it was really fun! I thoroughly recommend you see it by legitimate means (ie. not illegally downloading it) so that Disney continues to make female-lead, diverse and original films like Tomorrowland!

JurassicWorld

Jurassic World
OK so this was another film I was going to dedicate an entire post to. I actually typed it up but since it was just a big rant about all of the bits that pissed me off, I decided not to share it with the world. So this is my condensed rant instead. Look, it was fun. I saw it twice and I’ll probably buy it on bluray. But it was pretty darn disappointing. I LOVE Jurassic Park, I watch it a lot and even watched it twice in one day after seeing this new one (because it’s that damn good), so I knew I was probably going to be a bit disappointed, but I had no idea just how much or why. First of all, the story line? A dinosaur theme park gets built despite the tragic occurrences in 1993, is successful but needs new, made-up dinosaurs with extra teeth to keep people excited. Also one guy can kind of get raptors to obey commands so another guy wants to send them to war to eat our enemies. WHO WROTE THAT? Did they just quiz some 8 year olds on what they should do and then mash the idea together without even bothering to link it all together?! Also, we need to discuss who the fuck designed the park. Who lets teenagers control their own giant glass balls among dinosaurs and not have a recall function if something happens? Who thought it’d be OK to have a giant underwater dinosaur enclosure right near the boardwalk where guests wander around? WHO ENTERS A DINOSAUR ENCLOSURE WITHOUT BEING ABSOLUTELY CERTAIN THE DINOSAUR ACTUALLY GOT OUT??? OK so this is quickly turning into my full-blown rant so I’ll stop (though I could go on for a while still). But really, how was this meant to follow up Jurassic Park anyway? How the hell do you make a character played by Chris Pratt so completely boring?  If you’re yet to see it just… don’t expect too much from it, ok?

InsideOut

Inside Out
I knew this film was going to be great when I realised it was directed by the guys who wrote/directed such treasure as UP, Monsters Inc, Wall-E etc. While I wouldn’t say it has become my favourite Pixar film, it was absolutely wonderful and a joy to watch. The basic premise is that our emotions are actually controlled by cute little creatures in our brain such as Joy, Sadness, Fear, Disgust and Anger. When we’re kids they’re very simple and distinct from one another but as we mature they start to change and merge together to form complex new ones. The whole film is a brilliant metaphor for depression which kids probably won’t fully comprehend but many adults who suffer depression would identify with, as the main character finds her “core memories” (which shape her personality) tinged with blue when Sadness feels compelled to touch them. As expected from the guys who wrote that bloody beginning sequence of UP, there’s a real tear jerker in this film (I had to try very hard not to ugly-cry) which will make even the hardest bastard shed a tear ;_;

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What I Wore: Rainbows, unicorns and a tiny dog

June 26, 2015
Fashion and makeup, Feminism, My Life, What I Wore, Wonderful Weekend

Last weekend I spent the day doing wedding stuff with my mum, which called for a fun, bright outfit of course! I recently got some stockings from We Love Colors which are the perfect compliment to my kawaii outfits! My theme was pretty loose, I just wanted to wear my unicorn dress and lots of bright colours really, and this was the result. As you can see, Midwich was pretty excited to be included, haha.

  

Dress: Attack of the Unicorn Reversible Skater Dress from Black Milk Clothing
Stockings: Plus Sized Nylon/Lycra Tights in Lilac from We Love Colors
Vest: Neon yellow vest from Target
Shoes: Converse Low Tops from DFO
Necklace: Feminist pride necklace by Miss-a-Ree Guts Creations, choker from City Beach
Hair Bow: Ruby Kawaii, of course!

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What I Wore: Black, white and splashes of bright pink

June 23, 2015
Fashion and makeup, My Life, Parties and Fun, What I Wore

To follow up my recent post about dressing more kawaii, here’s another outfit post from last weekend (gosh I’m slack as positing these withing a decent time frame). I was going to a friends housewarming party which was going to be a very casual affair so I opted for comfort to go with the cute. I gotta say, black and white with a splash of a bright coloyr is one of my most favourite fashion styles because it’s easy to do and pretty darn effective!

 

Dress: Free Spirit Skater dress from Black Milk Clothing
Cardigan: Unknown. I’ve had it for years and I wish I had one in every colour!
Stockings: Sporty Stripes Hosiery from Black Milk Clothing
Shoes: Pink flatform Converse low tops from Hype DC
Flower crown: Made by my sister
Necklace: Fancy Pocket in Harajuku
Bat ring: 6% Doki Doki in Harajuku (the other rings are ones I’ve had forever)

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Femmo Bites – There’s no such thing as misandry

June 19, 2015
Cara Rage, Feminism, femmo bites, In the News, Pissed Off, Random Thoughts, Rants

I wrote this post this morning on Facebook after being totally bummed out by the horrendous comments left on a post by a prominent Australian feminist writer who criticised the culture of shaming women for sending nude photos and not the men who violate the woman’s trust by sharing them with others:

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What I Wore: Kawaii Forever!

June 2, 2015
Body and Soul, Fashion and makeup, My Life, Parties and Fun, What I Wore


While in Japan I had a sort of epiphany about myself and the way I express myself with my clothing. I like dressing up in cute, matching outfits but I tend to only find myself going the extra mile for special events while keeping it pretty simple (to the point of being kinda boring) on work days and even on weekend when I haven’t got anything special on. After a lot of thought, I have decided that it’s about time I start dressing more “me” now I’m back in Brisbane. The days I dressed up extra kawaii while in Japan, with everything matching and being noticeable from three blocks away was awesome, I absolutely loved it and it just felt right. I want to add more kawaii to my daily outfits beyond just wearing a matching hairbow. I want to ramp it up, try out decora fashion, buy more kids accessories to wear, experiment with makeup and just generally add more colour and accessories to my life. It’s not about trying to attract attention (though I accept it’s inevitable) but about expressing myself with the things I love to wear.

I know some people will judge, thinking I’m too old or too fat for such fashions, but I simply do not care for those sorts of opinions any more. I want to be true to myself and have fun with fashion! This means I need to start planning outfits in advance instead of panicking in the morning and throwing on whatever is easiest to grab, which is the case most morning before work. I’m pretty lucky that my work is pretty cool about my fashion choices so I might as well embrace it! I also need to invest in some coloured stockings to go with my outfits as the regular ol’ black leggings/stockings under 99% of my dresses just ain’t good enough any more. I’m going to get some of the solid colour tights and footless tights from We Love Color, if you know of any other companies that make awesome coloured stockings in decent sizes (none of this “one size” crap) or have tried We Love Color stuff before, please let me know!

So anyway, this is what I wore on Saturday to a friends birthday party with my new plan in mind. The black stockings really didn’t go but I wanted to cover my legs a bit as it’s starting to cool down here (hence my need for pretty new stockings). I didn’t even go full-kawaii as I was running late but after some initial nerves, for god knows what reason, I felt pretty good!

 
Skirt: Little Lovers Cheerleader Skirt from Black Milk Clothing
Top: Basic tee from H&M
Jacket: Recycled and dyed LA Gear denim jacket from WC in Harajuku
Stockings: Sporty Stripes Hosiery from Black Milk Clothing
Shoes: Neon Pink Leopard Vans from Platypus Shoes
Accessories: Heart choker from Romantic Standard in Harajuku, hairbow and necklace by Ruby Kawaii

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Japan: A Quick Summary

May 28, 2015
Japan, Life, My Life, Nails, Nerds and Geeks, Parties and Fun, Travel

godzilla

Hello friends! Ben and I are officially back from our 3-and-a-bit weeks in Japan and we’re already back at work! No time for rest ever, apparently! We had an AMAZING time on our trip, we barely stopped until close to the end and only because we were totally exhausted.

Our first stop was Tokyo where we spent 10 days. The first two we stayed with our friends Anekie and Iain who have been there for four years and are both teachers. They took us around a few of the days we were there including a huge day in Harajuku, to an Oktoberfest (yes, in May) in Odaiba, to a traditional street festival with lots of drunk people carrying shrines, karaoke, maid cafes and much more. On our own we explored places like Shinjuku (where we stayed), Nakano Broadway, Roppongi, Akihabara and Shibuya. We visited the Ghibli Museum, took a day trip out to see the plum blossoms in the shadow of Mt Fuji, went to the Robot Restaurant and both Disney parks.

The 2nd stop was Osaka where we stayed for one week. We discovered Ame-mura for fashion, music and pinball arcades. We explored Dotonbori and it’s many touristy sights. We wandered through rose-filled parks and visited excellent looking shrines (not all of which were open, damn 5pm closing times). We took a day trip to Nara to pat deer, look at massive shrines and then sneak into abandoned theme parks. We made friends with the owners of an awesome toy shop who happened to be famous Universal Monsters collectors, who took us out and about and made us feel incredibly welcome. I even got my nails done and we spent a day at Universal Studios.

The 3rd spot was Hiroshima where we had four days, which turned out to not be nearly enough. We met a heavily tattooed man named Potty who’s famous for being the #1 fan of the Hiroshima Carp baseball team and his sweet wife Misa. They took us out to dinner and were fabulous hosts, though I got stupidly drunk at the BBQ we all went to (possibly the drunkest I’ve been in many years, but gosh it was fun). We went to the Hiroshima Peace Museum which probably would have been a lot more moving were it not for the 200 or so school kids crowding the place and being rowdy. We went to Miyajima Island to pat more deer (much nicer than the ones in Nara) and admire the floating shrine. We spent a day traveling to and on Okunoshima Island (while I was stupendously hungover) which is overrun by wild but friendly bunnies who were more than happy to climb all over you for the perfect photo. No amount of hangover can withstand the power of bunnies!

Our last stop was Kyoto because we knew we’d need a place to wind down after so doing so much. We still managed to visit a number of shrines and temples, walk through the bamboo forest and got halfway up the Fushimi Inari Shrine walk. We even stumbled upon the delightful Kyoto Arashiyama Orgel Music Box Museum which we highly recommend! We did manage to find a decent amount of time to wind down, relax and get acquainted with the fact our trip was ending. We’d done so much that we were actually pretty ready for it, plus we missed our dogs :)

I won’t be so bold to suggest I will get around to posting more detailed accounts of the trip (we all know how badly I did with my US trip in 2013) but I’ll definitely post a bit more about some of my favourite days, such as the time spent in Harajuku and our Nara day trip.

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Supanova Gold Coast 2015

April 28, 2015
disappointment tuesday, Fashion and makeup, My Life, Nerds and Geeks, Ruby Kawaii, What I Wore

Last weekend was Supanova on the Gold Coast! These days we don’t get much time to do markets for Ruby Kawaii but we still keep up with pop culture conventions. I’m a little bit sad to say it was our last Goldnova though. It was just not worth our time to be honest. This was the first con we’ve done where we didn’t get stressed out as we still had a lot of bows leftover from Brisnova last year (it was a little bit slow too) and we even had somewhere to stay on the Gold Coast so we didn’t have to drive the 90 mins to and fro each day. But despite all that we just didn’t make enough sales to justify doing it again next year. Other stallholders said they were disappointed too, so it wasn’t just us having a bad weekend. I guess that between a dozen other stalls also selling bows (grrr) and the fact it’s so expensive to go to Supanova now (after paying to get in, buying food and getting a celeb autograph or photo, who has money for trinkets?) I think people have to be more careful with where they spend their cash. Ahh well, we had a good run. We’ll keep doing the Brisbane ones (I will hopefully also start doing nails at them) and leave the Gold Coast ones to go as a regular patron.

Here are some photos from the weekend. I just want to say I did a pretty big thing on the Sunday by wearing a crop top to match my sister. My body image is a bit shite and I am forever envious of my sisters (mostly) effortless, slim figure but I decided I needed to stop being so negative about my body and start practicing some body love! I actually feel like I made a significant difference to my self esteem that day, I’m starting to be less critical of my perceived flaws and

  
 
  
 
On the Saturday I wore the A Whole New World scoop skater dress from Black Milk Clothing.
On the Sunday Erin and I wore the matching Little Lovers crop and skirt set, also from Black Milk.
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